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Are You Worth It?

By | Charlotte's Blog | No Comments

You are worth more than you think.

A lie that one is likely to believe in an abusive situation is, “You are not worth it.”

Most likely the abuser, or addict, believes they are not of value, so they project their self-loathing onto others. If one already possesses a rather low self-image, there is likely little within, to stand firm and say, “You are wrong!” Instead, one is likely to slowly believe the sick individual, to whom they have given great credence, in hopes of perhaps finding their own significance.

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Addiction Affects More Than the Addict

By | Abuse, Addiction/Codependnecy, Charlotte's Blog | No Comments

We are all coming to see, and tragically many of us experience the destructive force of drugs.

They are killing and imprisoning those we love at a devastating rate.
What is not spoken about enough, is the ruins addiction injects into the family unit.

If you are connected emotionally with someone who is self-medicating, you are in need of treatment as much as they are! I know this doesn’t make sense. You are likely feeling out of control, angry, and reacting in ways that cause you to feel shame and regret for your behavior. It is crazy making. You are hiding something in hopes it will go away-it will not!

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A SEEP Reflection for 2017

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A SEEP Reflection for 2017

I have decided to do a little reflecting, in hopes that you will follow my lead and do your own reflecting. Many of us are very hard on ourselves, and we point out our flaws regularly. Taking a few moments to let the truth of how we have grown override the reminders of how we’ve fallen short is one way of combating the negativity in our mind. Perhaps you aren’t as wrapped up in your own failings, but the decisions of others are seemingly destroying your peace. Taking time to acknowledge the accomplishments, as well as growth, will help. It is essential to take time and ponder growth, past, and future.

I will model the S~E~E~P™ method.


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Soul Work for Cancer – A Chapter for Your Review

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I find worry to be a foolish waste of time; it accomplishes nothing, disregards the power of prayer, and takes a toll on us physically. ~Charlotte Chaney

I am on the cusp of rereleasing my debut book under its new title, Soul Work for Cancer: Living a Life Interrupted by Cancer.

I decided to post a teaser this week with the first chapter. You can purchase the book at my website or on Amazon (Coming Soon).

Please Pray for/Worry about Me

July 1, 2011

I find myself offended when I hear, “I’m worried about you.” I should take the comment as, “You matter to me and I sincerely care about your circumstances,” but all too often, I flat out reject those words.

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That’s Not Fair! Feeling Invalidated but Moving Forward

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Recently, someone I love was misrepresented to a judge as I sat by helplessly. The opposing counsel steadily focused on their goal, to win for their client.

I wanted to scream, “That’s a lie, that’s is inaccurate!” I was to sit quietly and respectfully in my seat like everyone else.

I think about all the people who feel misrepresented by government leaders. It is maddening when others are making decisions, without the full story. You may adamantly oppose the outcome, and yet it affects you. Someone is setting things in place that are out of your control.

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Greeted With a Smile

By | Charlotte's Blog | 4 Comments

I grew up surrounded by smiles
We take for granted our access to clean water, HVAC systems, and food, but recently I have realized there was something else I take for granted. I grew up surrounded by smiles. I never understood what a precious gift that was.

I would have to say every single time I have seen my mother over the last 48 years; there has been a clear message that she loves me. Indeed, there were times of great trial, but I can assure you I have always known her love for me. In many ways, this is because she acknowledges my presence in a genuinely caring way. Whether it is “Good morning,” when I wake up, “hello” as I walk into a room, or the way she can’t wait to see me when arriving home from being away.

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Taming Emotional Landmines

By | Charlotte's Blog | 2 Comments

taming emotions

Once I left an emotionally abusive household, I began to realize the impact that my environment had on my sharp reactions to emotional triggers. Often people will stay in a toxic environment where they experience invalidation of feelings and distortion of the truth. Oppressive environments cause people reflect character traits that are not true to themselves. The behavior is a symptom of toxic environments.

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Gratitude: The Great Healer

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I used to resent the fact that I was from a broken home

 I used to resent the fact that I was from a broken home.

Over the years I have become grateful for my blended family and the steps my parents took to find and model happiness.

My parents were not perfect, but they both possess the gift of gratitude. Regardless of the situations, we faced over the years, that attitude of appreciation made painful conditions smoother

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Accidentally In Love

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“God, do You think I could have a boyfriend?”

It was August 14th, 2015, the night before my book signing at the Christian Bookstore in Frederick, Maryland. I always have an ongoing dialog with God but this was the first time I had ever even mentioned such a thing.

It had been a great summer. I was enjoying the freedom of being out of an emotionally abusive marriage. I was doing tremendous work on my healing journey. I didn’t need a boyfriend, and whoever God had in store for me, would have to be ok with my commitment to sexual purity.
The book signing was an hour away. To be honest, it wasn’t the busiest book singing ever, but suddenly my life changed.

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Enjoying Your Life to Spite Your Negative Self-talk

By | Charlotte's Blog | No Comments

Charlotte Chaney in the ninth grade.In my head, I was the wildest, most screwed up, stupidest girl in the 9th grade.

After 30 years, however, I put on my big-girl panties and attended a high school reunion. I didn’t graduate from the school where the reunion was. I boarded there in 8th and 9th grade. It is a very rigorous school, academically, and my brain thrives in a more creative environment. Fortunately, I was able to finish high school at a place that was perfectly designed for creative girls like me. I thrived and graduated from there.

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